OMG You did Gina Ford???

OMG You did Gina Ford???

So I actually DID try Gina Ford with my first, 13yrs ago (shock horror, what a bitch)…I have to be honest parenting was a whole heap easier then than it is now! There really wasn’t the judgemental crap around then, and to be fair most of the crap today is spouted by so called “experts”.

There has been an explosion in the “baby business” in the time I have had children, now I fully accept I am part of that! When I first started teaching 10yrs ago there were very few classes, now the market is saturated! 

Birth is SO IMPORTANT

THIS IS NOT A BLOG ON NATURAL BIRTH VS CS....

Birth is so important, sadly many of us  don't realise how important until we have actually done it! 

It is a subject I could talk about all day.!! It is bloody amazing! But it comes in so many different ways, it doesn't matter what way it comes, as long as it is YOUR way, and YOU feel like you had an element of control.

It isn't HOW you give birth, but how you FEEL about that birth...As a society we are managing birth more and more, and with that comes difficulties. In some cases, birth absolutely needs to be managed, and inductions and interventions save millions of mums and babies lives, however WE need to play a part in that process. 

Nothing should happen in your birth or your labour without your consent, the terminology used sometimes can make us think that things are happening that we have no choice over. You need to understand the options and choices, YOU make an informed decision. We talk about the BRAIN acronym in class (Benefits, Risks, Alternatives, Instinct, Nothing). There are benefits and RISKS to EVERYTHING we do, we must understand them all to make an informed decision. 

If we feel that things are happening that we didn't choose, or that we don't understand, we begin to feel out of control. I am not saying we can control labour, we can't, babies tend to do that, but we can control ourselves. We can understand a situation and feel like we are part of the decision making process, therefore feeling an element of control. We can understand adrenaline (next blog), we can understand its impact, how it is designed to make us feel, a primitive and instinctive response to many things, but most importantly how we can control it. It doesn't really matter what is going on around you, if you feel calm and in control within yourself you have a far better chance of having a positive outcome. Birth Trauma is real...

"Birth trauma is in the eye of the beholder"
Cheryl Beck (Nursing Research January/February 2004 Vol 53, No.1)

The Birth Trauma Association states: 
"It is clear that some women experience events during childbirth (as well as in pregnancy or immediately after birth) that would traumatise any normal person.

For other women, it is not always the sensational or dramatic events that trigger childbirth trauma but other factors such as loss of control, loss of dignity, the hostile or difficult attitudes of the people around them, feelings of not being heard or the absence of informed consent to medical procedures."

Giving birth is a huge event in any woman's life, we gear up for the actual birth, sometimes not thinking past how it will be when the baby is here. Those first few hours, days, weeks and months pass in a blur. Breastfeeding is rarely as easy as we think...the chances of developing PND are 50% higher in those mums who wanted to breastfeed and couldn't, birth trauma can have a devastating impact on the early hours and days of breastfeeding.

Newborn babies are hard work, no one tells you how hard, a mix of sleep deprivation, sore nipples (sore everything!), and massive hormone surges makes those early hours and days difficult, without adding birth trauma (or worse PTSD) to the mix. 

Some of us need to take in all the information we can get our hands on, some of us are better with the bare minimum. Choose a course that suits you, but choose it so that you can prepare for YOUR birth.

Birth via CS, next to a lake with a baby deer present, or in hospital taking as many drugs as you want, it doesn't matter, what matters is YOU and your birth partner, and that YOU are part of the choices and decisions made.

The Importance of ME

The Importance of ME

This is something I have been thinking about for a long time, and even though I don’t do New Years resolutions, one of them, if I did, would be to give more time and importance to ME. 

Since having kids nearly 13yrs ago, both my husband and I set up our own businesses, so money has always been in short supply. I readily buy the kids clothes, but the thought of buying something for myself is a total luxury! Our grand plans of making sure we make time for “us” with regular “date nights” has fizzled into a meal once every 5/6 months if we are lucky! 

How to be an awesome parent!

How to be an awesome parent!

Parenting in my opinion is hard, and it is getting harder…not because parenting itself is getting harder, but the society we live in is making it harder! We know too much, we are all trying to find reasons and diagnosis for everything, we blame ourselves for everything. Human beings are incredibly complex creatures, we can’t put one behaviour or attribute to a particular thing that we as parents did…for example, I blame myself for my daughter getting eczema, in my head, it was obviously something I did when she was a baby. Was it because I introduced formula too early? Or because I used too many Baby Products on her from birth? My boy has a stammer, I have been offered “parenting” workshops, which immediately, in my head means it was caused by something I had done! You need to have a pretty thick skin nowadays to be a parent!

Reflux

Reflux

This is one of hardest questions faced by a new mum, why is my baby crying? There are lots of reasons a newborn baby cry’s, in this one I want to explore reflux.

Reflux in babies is baby bringing up milk frequently, or silent reflux where a baby will suffer the effects of the milk regurgitation but don’t actually bring it out.

It is a relatively common and usually occurs because baby’s food pipe (oesophagus) is still developing. Babies usually grow out of reflux by the time they turn 1.

Stuff! How much "stuff" does your newborn need?

Stuff! How much "stuff" does your newborn need?

So much bloody stuff is needed for a baby? Really? Do you really need all this stuff?? Seriously, no you don’t!! There has been an explosion of baby paraphernalia in the last 15-20yrs.

The baby market is a multi BILLION dollar industry! The more “stuff” we think we need for our babies, the less we trust our instincts and rely on "us" to give our babies what they need.

So what do you actually need to buy? The below is based on my own opinions and experience, working with thousands of parents postnatally and my own three children.

Colic

Colic

The words every mum of a tiny baby dreads – Colic!!! This blog is designed to help understand what colic is, or could be. We will talk about how to decipher whether your baby is suffering with it, or whether they are just displaying normal newborn behavior, and how you can help with both.

Why we need to #breakthestigma

Why we need to #breakthestigma

I have been running antenatal and baby classes for over 10 years now.

I had the awful news just under a year ago that one of our mums had taken her own life after suffering from depression. She had been taking classes with us for almost a year and I had had regular chats with her. I had no idea how much she was suffering. I was shocked to the core to hear the news that she taken her life leaving behind a little girl not yet 18 months old.

How to achieve a Positive Birth

How to achieve a Positive Birth

I’ve said it before, I will say it again, birth is bloody important!! It’s not how you birth that is important, it is how you feel about how your birth went that is important!

There will always be those of us who aren’t able to have a straight forward birth, and we need to be making sure that we still feel empowered, understanding, accepting and confident about how we birth.